Random Sade IM

him: soft rock… less talk
me: haha
me: the wave
him: HAHA
me: freaking sade, soft rock stations are obsessed with sade
me: and sting
him: the wave was so terrible
me: i think it’s still around, no?
him: i don’t think so
me: oh my friend
him: wait.. it is
me: http://947thewave.radio.com/
me: and who’s on the front?
me: SADE!

Random Discovery IM

me: i was in the meeting with [coworkers], somehow we started talking about pee wee herman and were trying to figure out the fat kid’s name in the movie
me: so we go to imdb and find out it’s ‘francis’
me: [coworker] says he wants to see what else he was in
me: turns out he was the guy in naked gun who said “look! it’s enrico pallazo!”
him: HAHAHAHAHHA
me: easily the best discovery of the week
him: IMDB is fantastic
me: it really is
me: and i always thought francis was a dweeb but anyone who gets credit for saying “enrico pallazo” is okay in my book
him: haha

Random Salary IM

me: did you know samuel dalembert’s salary this year is over $13 million
him: no way
me: about $700k less than dwayne wade
him: wow
him: that’s like 90% of haiti’s GDP
me: haha
me: haiti’s chief export is samuel dalembert
him: haha

Random Updates IM

me: it’s funny, i bought that new laptop and i’m amazed how different the technology is today than when i bought my last one a few years ago
me: however, i noticed the only department not making advances is screensavers
me: pretty sure they still have the same ones as my first computer in 1994 had
me: scrolling marquee, get the hell out of here
him: haha

Random NSFW IM

me: sl_ts is really a dirty pair of consonant bookends
me: slots, slits, sluts
him: haha

Random Sports Fans IM

me: there were like 200 total fans there and most of them were older
me: felt like the game was being held in a del webb community
him: haha
him: concession stands had nothing but prune juice
me: the game starts at 3:30pm
him: haha
him: maybe a nice combo meal with sauteed turnips
me: haha
me: angela lansbury is the emcee
him: streisand sung the national anthem
him: duet with kenny rogers
me: haha

Random Reading IM

me: i’m a fan of a good prologue
me: it’s the appetizer of books
him: haha
me: better than the epilogue
me: it’s like come on, i’ve already read this, what more do you have to say
him: haha
him: epilogue is basically the writer saying… so you’ve read 300 pages already, and i’m not confident you understood my point
me: haha
me: let me explain this again

Random Racial Harmony IM

him: so he texted me from the kings game last night
him: i told him, “just remember, the black guy on the team isn’t named kobe and you’ll be fine”
him: haha
me: HAHA
me: is there a black guy on the kings?
him: yeah
him: he’s “black”
him: but he’s from canada
me: oh wow
me: that’s not black
me: that’s dark white
him: haha
him: off black
me: haha

Random Down Under IM

him: what do they use for currency in australia, koalas?
me: haha
me: fosters
him: barbies?
him: haha
me: fosters, australian for currency

Random Acreage IM

him: “Call Now to Get Employee Discount”
him: that’s the call to action for a LARGE ACREAGE LAND campaign
me: HAHA
me: that must be a hell of an employee discount
me: buy one plot, get one free
him: haha
me: or a nice parcel
him: haha
me: now with free eminent domain
him: haha
him: gotta love eminent domain